Q: My boyfriend proposed to me last week and I’m very excited about our future. We’ve been through a lot in the past four years (break up, job loss, miscarriage) and it feels good to finally make a statement to the world that we’re still strong. The problem is I hate the ring. I don’t just dislike it, I literally can’t stand the sight of it. I’m not superficial at all and it’s not about the size of the diamond or how expensive it is. It’s the fact that nothing about this ring represents me or my style. It’s as if he just got whatever he saw first and hoped for the best. Am I within my rights to tell him I don’t like it, or am I forced to wear this thing for the rest of my life?

A: Well, congrats, first of all (I guess). I’m glad to hear that your relationship has weathered quite a few storms. It bodes well for you that you can stay together through tough times. However, this hatred for your ring sounds a bit…extreme. I understand that this is a symbol of you and your commitment. And yes, of course you want to wear something you love and are proud of. At the end of the day, your fiancé wants you to be happy. So, go for it. Tell him that you have something else in mind for your engagement ring. Dress it up however you want (ie: “I think a round diamond would look better on my finger” or “I’m too conservative for rainbow colored stones”). If you guys have never discussed rings before, cut him a little slack. Be ready to deal with the hurt ego of your fiancé and the awkward conversation where you tell him he screwed up. But this too shall pass and soon you’ll be planning your wedding. I’m typically not into people holding back when they’re in a committed relationship. Honesty (99% of the time) is truly the best policy.